Well another big event for the Veatch family this past weekend, my "little" brother Jeremy got married! It was a beautiful wedding and I think the whole family had a great time cutting loose on the dance floor :) When I got married there was the opportunity for friends and family to say something to Patrick and I at our rehearsal dinner, and after several people said some really kind words that had me holding back the tears, my sweet brother got up and spoke, which resulted in the ugly cry for me and many others :) I did not know if this same opportunity would come over his wedding weekend, but in case it did I thought about how I could put into words just what a special guy my brother is.
What would I say?
Jeremy and Christina's story is similar to mine and Patrick's because they knew very quickly that they would get married and therefore, they will really get to know the depths of each other, as a married couple. I wanted Christina to know just how blessed she is that she gets to walk through life with Jeremy, that he grew up with 2 older sisters, who made sure he knew how women were to be treated and he had learned well over the past 27 years. With 5 kids in the family we each have special relationships with each other for various reasons, we have been through ups and downs with each other, and we have caused each other heartache while quickly rising up against anyone else who did so. For whatever reason Jeremy and I have been close since the beginning; he and I were more alike then myself and Jenn so our shared interests resulted in a close bond. I remember when we were really little, we would beg mom to let Jeremy sleep in my bed with me, most of the time she said no, probably knowing that we would play instead of sleep, but after mom and dad said their good nights, Jeremy would sneak into our room and get in bed with me (at least we thought he was being sneaky, I suspect that my mother was very aware of what was going on). We would giggle and play until we heard mom coming and then Jeremy would run to his room with his hands covering his rear end, knowing if he got caught he was getting one "down the pike" as my mom says :) Sometimes Jenn and I would say "Jeremy, quick mom is coming!" just to see him run out of the room covering his fanny : ). As we got older Jeremy and I stayed close, minus a few of his teenage years where I found myself wanting to kick him in the head. Teenage boys are the worst in case any of you are wondering : ) I guess because I was older, Jeremy was never very protective of me, not like he is with Emily, and really he did not take much interest in my "love life". When Patrick and I got engaged, there was a disconnect there, Jeremy and I never talked about the wedding or my impending marriage. He was civil to Patrick but didn't make much effort to get to know him, and for while it hurt my feelings. Really, it was this way with all of my siblings, as much as they all wanted this for me, they were having a hard time dealing with the fact that someone was taking me away, I was no longer theirs. Patrick was one more person, coming between the 5 of us, the link between Jeremy and I was breaking and this other man (practically a stranger) was standing in between us. It is a strange unexpected feeling when a sibling gets married, lot's of bitter sweetness going around. All that to say that I was very surprised when Jeremy spoke the way he did at my rehearsal dinner, what I thought was him not caring about my wedding was really him dealing with me becoming a married woman and everything that goes along with that. Jeremy was never a big dater, we had a running joke about his "3 weekers" because that's about how long he would keep a girlfriend before he would tire of the obligation of being someones boyfriend. We always said that it was going to take one girl to sweep him off his feet and that would be it. And we were right :) I will never forget the day that I told Jeremy that Patrick and I had decided that we were going to get married. In sort of an off handed way Jeremy said "well I guess I can start looking now". In that moment, I realized that my brother was purposely NOT looking for his wife because he wanted me to find my husband first. Jeremy knew that after years of going to my friends weddings alone, that it would be very painful for me to attend his wedding without my husband, and he kept blinders on in order to not put me through that. That is the kind of guy that he is. That is what I want Christina to know, that her new husband is one of the best, and that even when it doesn't feel like it, he will always have her back, and will put her first no matter where life takes them.
That is what I would have said.
So to my brother and his new bride: Jeremy, I love you, no matter how big my family gets, no matter how big your family gets, you will always be my brother and my friend. Thank you for quietly supporting me as I struggled through years of heartache waiting for my husband, I will never forget it. Christina, I was 12 when Emily was born and I feel now how I did then, because I knew that a new sister will only make life better! Thanks for making my brother smile :)
Cheers.
