I have been wanting to post a new blog for awhile now but I was trying to wait until some things were more settled. For over a month now Patrick and I have been in the process of getting a loan so that we could buy a house that we kind of fell in love with at first sight.
After a long several weeks of dealing with the bank, the only thing we are waiting for is the appraisal report, and we have heard a possible closing date of September 14th. Patrick and I seem to choose this time of year for milestones, we met in August, a year later we got married in September, and now a year later we are buying a house. Wonder what milestone next year will hold....:)
Along with the stress of all that, I have started my own at home business with a company called ViSalus. Most of you have seen my Facebook posts so I won't go into too much detail, but I have been praying that the Lord would provide a way for me to be able to stay at home when we have kids and this door opened up and so far it's been really exciting, first of all because its helping me to lose some weight and be healthier, second, because it is possible that if my business does well, my husband will not have to work 24/7 and may get to see our children grow up :)
My last couple of posts have been mostly about the anxiety that I struggle with and to be honest, it is still a huge part of my life. The medicine that I am on is helping, I am able to function at a fairly normal level, at least to anyone watching from the outside. In my desperation to feel like a human being again, I gladly went back on the meds and sort of put it in the back of my mind that at some point I would have to come back off if I ever wanted to have a baby, which most of you know, has been my hearts strongest desire since I was a little girl. Patrick and I are not even talking about starting a family yet, we (and when I say we, I mean he, because I was ready like, yesterday) feel that we need more time to get prepared ;) However, it is something that is probably in the not too distant future, Lord willing, and I need to start really thinking about how I am going to do this. I know that my God is bigger than this, that He's got it, and that I need to rest in that. But when I think that my child might suffer because of me, I lose it. I am working up the nerve to ask the Elders of our church to pray over me. I just want to make sure that when this happens, that I go in with complete and total belief that God will heal me. That is a victory that I will celebrate for the rest of my life if He chooses to let me have it.
Onto happier things.....it has almost been a whole year since we got married! Its so hard to believe. It has been the best year of my life, being married to Patrick is like...........having a constant play date. Sometimes we will fall into bed at night, so tired from the long day and we will end up getting so tickled at something, and both be laughing our heads off and then of course being wide awake again. Life is so much better with him around :)
We did suffer a loss a couple of months ago, our dog Piper died unexpectantly at the end of May and we buried her out at the Farm. It was a very sad day, Patrick still makes fun of me for how hard I cried after always saying how much I am not a dog person.
We were not going to get another dog for awhile but after Piper died, Izzy was being very whiny and needy and we felt like it wasn't fair to leave her at home all day by herself so we decided to get her a new playmate. Enter Bessie Boo!:
Now, we thought that by getting another Beagle mix we would be getting a dog with about the same temperament as Piper. Wrong. Where Piper was very submissive and calm, she hated to be in trouble and was very laid back and chill, Bessie is the complete opposite. She is like this little ball of hyperactivity, if she could talk I imagine she would say "WHOO HOO!!! I love being outside! I'm going to chase that bug, no wait, I'm going to dig a hole, or maybe I'll try to get Izzy to play with me, or......the list goes on". Izzy did not (and still doesn't sometimes) want anything to do with Bessie, we don't blame her, Bessie is a lot to take in, but we are working on it. Even though we would rather have Piper back, she did come with a lot of baggage, her past greatly affected (effected? I can never remember) who she was and Bessie was at a great home before us, so she has no fear, no qualms about letting us know when she wants some attention. We get woken up all throughout the night with her crying for someone to play with her, Piper was too timid to be so bold! But we still miss her and wish she was still with us.
Anyway, I just wanted to catch everyone up on the happenings at The Stone House, we've had a year of laughter, tears, craziness, but mostly love so I would count it a very successful first year of marriage :) I know there is a lot going on with everyone and so many people in much more desperate situations than I am in, but if I come to your mind during your prayer times, just do me a favor and tell God that you too, believe that He will heal me. I don't deserve it, I've done nothing to earn it, but my sweet precious children, who I am already in love with, do deserve to have a mom that can take them places and help them experience life and adventure. Thanks Friends.
"But give great joy to those who came to my defense. Let them continually say, 'Great is the Lord, who delights in blessing His servant with peace!'" Psalm 35: 27
